Don't Get Kidnapped

Once someone tries kidnapping you, you have only one opportunity to save yourself.

It’s a lot more uncomfortable than it looks.

Agent Max was kidnapped recently and held in captivity. He was interrogated, but later escaped and evaded re-capture. Don’t worry; it’s the life of a secret agent.

Of course, I wasn’t actually kidnapped. And no, I’m not really a secret agent, it’s just a persona I’ve adopted. I did, however, have an opportunity to take a course in survival, escape, resistance, and evasion, or SERE. Though typically associated with the military, the reality is, SERE is for everyone for the simple fact that we can all be kidnapped.

There are many schools out there across the United States and worldwide which offer SERE training. Many of these courses are taught by instructors with military experience, but again, SERE isn’t something which is military-specific. A knowledgeable instructor who themselves have undergone similar training can be as good as someone with military experience. Note that much of what’s taught in military SERE training isn’t applicable to civilians, anyway. Civilians comprise the majority of kidnapping victims, so it actually makes more sense to learn from a civilian, anyway.

Let’s discuss what we can learn from such training.

Kidnapping Is A Real Threat

Bottom line up front: the risk of kidnapping is low. The vast majority of us will be fortunate to live the entirety of our lives without anyone even trying to kidnap us. However, the risk of kidnapping is also much higher than you think, even in the United States.

Statistics are hard to come by, but one data set shows that 52,441 kidnappings occurred in the U.S. in 2022. That doesn’t seem like many in a country of over 330 million, but this comes out to odds of 15.5 per 100,000, or per capita. Again, that doesn’t seem like a lot, but if you consider that 100,000 is about the population of a small city, imagine 15 to 16 people being kidnapped from that city in a single year. Then, you might see why that might be a problem.

Even if kidnapping isn’t a high risk in the U.S., it’s a much higher risk in the rest of the world. Human trafficking is a serious problem in the rest of the world, including in the Western Hemisphere. Natalee Holloway’s disappearance in 2005 in Aruba is a sobering reminder of how suddenly it can happen anywhere on Earth, even in places which appear serene and nice to visit.

You’re Not In Control

I think this kind of goes without saying, but once you’re in captivity, you’re completely at the initiative and mercy of your captor. The time to fight has passed. There’s a reason the acronym “SERE” doesn’t include the word “fight”. That’s not to say you should give in and accept the fact you’re forever someone else’s prisoner, but it’s to say your actions and movements will be severely limited, dictated entirely by your captor.

Unless you’ve been in captivity, under police custody, or took a SERE course, it’s difficult to imagine what it’s like being a prisoner. We’re all so accustomed to having our freedom, to being able to do whatever we want, that we fail to comprehend what it means to not even be able to use the toilet when you need to, to have your hands bound for long periods of time. It’s extremely uncomfortable. Injuries and long-term ailments are always a possibility when in captivity, even when your captors don’t abuse you.

Watch this interview with two Americans about their ordeal after being kidnapped by a Mexican drug cartel to get a sense of what it’s like:

This is why a certain level of surrender is necessary. Not surrender to despair, but to the circumstances. If you’re a hostage, accept that you’re a hostage and play the role. Play it well. Life is very much an exercise in role-playing and following scripts. No matter how hard you try, once taken hostage, you’re not going to fight your way out of captivity. Eventually, an opportunity to escape may present itself, but it might be many hours, days, even weeks, months, or years until it does. That’s just the reality of being someone’s captive.

You’re Not Talking Your Way Out Of Captivity. Don’t Waste Your Breath.

I get it - it’s only natural to try communicating with your captors, to see if their humanity can be appealed to, so they can be convinced to let you go. Think about it, though - if they could be convinced to let you go, would they have gone through the trouble of kidnapping you in the first place?

At the risk of sounding cavalier, the act of kidnapping is a serious commitment. It involves a tremendous amount of effort and, once the attempt begins, there’s no turning back. Kidnappers, all of whom should be taken seriously, are dead-set on going all the way. They have to.

The biggest problem with trying to talk your way out of captivity is that you have no leverage. This is why hostage-takers will only speak to negotiators, because these are people who are able to offer them something in return for your life. That’s assuming they even have any intention of releasing you. They may instead decide to keep you around because they benefit from doing so.

Should you never talk with your captors? It depends. If they speak to you expecting a response, then absolutely, answer them. Refusing to answer may only set them off. Captors need to feel as though they’re in control, after all. Should you strike up a conversation with them on your own accord? It’s probably not a good idea. Communicating with them might get them to see you more as a living, breathing, human being, rather than an object to bargain with, but again, kidnapping is a strange way of making friends. Some captors are alert and aware to the possibility you may simply be trying to earn their sympathies so you can escape or be set free.

That said, if you need to communicate with your captors in order to survive, do it. If you have a medical condition or injury they need to be aware of, let them know. They may not care about you all that much, but you’re not any use to them dead, either.

Rescue Might Not Be Forthcoming

It all depends on the extent to which people are aware you’re in captivity and the circumstances under which you were taken captive. If you’re at the bank and robbers take you hostage, you can rest assured the cavalry is coming. The first police officer will arrive within minutes and there is a SWAT team on-call 24/7 for scenarios just like that.

If you travel to Syria and end up a hostage to ISIS? Good luck. That’s exactly what happened to 24-year-old Kayla Mueller in August 2013. It was months before a rescue attempt was made, largely because of difficulty in ascertaining her location - there’s a lesson there - and that plus all subsequent rescue attempts were unsuccessful. She was eventually killed under circumstances which remain unclear over 10 years after her death. The only consolation is that her captor, ISIS leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, was targeted and killed in a U.S. special operations raid in October 2019.

Another lesson to take from the Mueller tragedy is that the U.S. government got involved so quickly only because the Obama administration was increasingly focusing on Syria due to its ongoing civil war and the rise of ISIS. The reality is that the government’s ability to intervene is quite circumstantial, since they’re not responsible for individual choices. Though the U.S., along with most Western countries, have diplomatic missions in nearly all countries on Earth, some countries simply don’t have the same amount of eyes and resources dedicated to it. It’s one thing to get kidnapped in South Africa versus getting kidnapped in South Sudan, for example.

Likewise, if you end up traveling to a place like North Korea and getting captured, as Otto Warmbier did in 2016, your home government is going to have a hard time getting you out short of a rescue attempt because it cannot overrule foreign governments, not to mention it lacks influence with unfriendly states. It’s even worse if you get taken hostage by a non-state actor like ISIS or Hamas, since governments have next to no leverage over these groups.

If you have money, there are services which will provide what’s popularly known as “extraction” services. However, these services are very expensive, well outside the affordability of everyone except the wealthy and high net-worth individuals. Anecdotally, I’ve heard that more affordable, “mid-market” extraction services are available, though my research has come up dry. If anyone is aware of the existence of such services, I’d love to learn more.

If Someone Tries To Take You, Run, Fight, And Hide

Once someone tries kidnapping you, you have only one opportunity to save yourself. Take advantage of it. Your immediate response should be to run. Run towards crowds, where there are plenty of witnesses, maybe even people willing to help. Run into establishments, again, preferably with lots of people. If you see police, run towards them. Run into government offices. Whatever you do, don’t just stand there.

If running isn’t an option, or they catch up to you, it’s time to fight for your life. People are scared of fighting because they’re afraid their kidnappers will hurt them, but here’s the thing: they’re going to end up hurting you anyway. If you’re going to get hurt, at least let it be on your terms. Remember that kidnappers want you alive and at least not gravely injured. Otherwise, not only are you not of much use to them, they’ll have even less leverage in any potential negotiations. You can’t bargain with damaged goods, after all. I’m aware that hostages are often brutalized in captivity, but there’s a limit to how much harm they can cause before negotiation becomes impossible.

How hard should you fight back? Like it’s the last thing you’ll ever do. Kidnapping attempts are one of the few scenarios where all forms of violence are legally defensible. Not even the Wokest, most far-left district attorney imaginable will try to prosecute someone for killing their kidnapper (at least, one can hope). If you have a weapon, employ it immediately. If you have no weapons, either find one, or your hands and feet will have to do. Hurt them without regard for the consequences. Punch them in the head, stick your fingers in their eyes, choke them if that’s what it takes to get them to cease their attack.

That said, don’t make it your goal to hurt or kill them. Violence is a means of breaking contact. Once you’ve created an opening for yourself, start running. However, understand your kidnapper will likely continue to pursue you, unless you’ve managed to incapacitate them. This is why you have to fight ferociously. A kidnapper cannot run after you if they sprain their ankle in the struggle. Again, it’s not your goal to hurt or kill them, but understand you’re going to have to inflict serious damage in order to make them stop.

Which brings us to the billion-dollar question: what if you’re faced with multiple kidnappers? This is a very real concern: a more “professional” kidnapping attempt will undoubtedly involve more than one participant. Without going as far as to say you’re screwed, it’s going to be very difficult to fight off a group of people. Your only hope is that there are plenty of people around who can act as witnesses or even intervene. Or maybe you have a weapon which negates the numerical disadvantage, but guess what: they probably have weapons too.

Just as pressing a question: what if you’re accompanied by vulnerable people? What if you have your kids, an elderly or less able family member, or if you’re a man, you have your wife/girlfriend with you? There’s nothing easy about this. All I can offer you is this…

Don’t Get Kidnapped In The First Place!

The first and last line of defense against kidnapping is awareness. It’s something I’ve spoken about in great depth many times here on this Substack. It’s about more than just looking around - it’s also about paying attention to detail. For example, how many people are around you? How close are they to you? Is there anyone who seems suspicious? If you’re walking on the street, is there a someone following you? How about a vehicle? You can’t live your life constantly on Red Alert, suspicious of everyone and everything, but you also need to be able to recognize when something isn’t right. The same vehicle traveling slowly behind you for blocks on end isn’t normal.

If you keep seeing the same person in multiple locations, it’s time to pay attention. It could very well be coincidence and seeing the same person over and over again isn’t in itself a suspicious occurrence, especially if you just happen to live in the same area. Again, just increase your awareness. Most people strangely believe that you’re either totally relaxed or totally paranoid, but the fact is, we’re all at varying states of awareness, we’re just not conscious to it. We should be at Yellow Alert when outside the home, anyway. There’s not much to being at Yellow; you’re just more observant, not totally oblivious to what’s happening around you, but not hyper-focused on any specific area of concern, either.

If you do get the sense someone might be following you, consider changing course immediately. Go someplace with lots of people and try to get lost in the crowd. It may dissuade them from following you. If it doesn’t, then you know with certainty they’re a danger to you. If you can put some space between yourself and them, use the distance and time created to call the police. If you can find a place to hide, do it. If you can make it to a police station or private security office, even better.

If you’re headed home and you think you’re being followed, don’t let them follow you home. Yes, our home is our castle, but only if you’re willing to defend it with force. It’s probably better, again, to just go to a publicly-accessible space with lots of people. The more confined the space, the better. What I mean by that is you want to be in a space where you’re less likely to be isolated. For example, if you enter a park, there may be lots of people around, but the spaciness of it means your pursuer might also be able to more easily put you in a place to be grabbed with nobody else in a position to assist you, even if they witness your kidnapping.

If you enter a bar or a mall, however, you’re inside a structure where people are in much closer proximity to one another, and you can place obstacles, such as furniture, between yourself and your would-be kidnapper. Then you have lots of other testosterone-laden men under the influence of alcohol; especially if you’re a woman, they can become useful to you if someone tries putting their hands on you. The key is to make it as difficult and costly as possible for them to take you.

On that note, it’s important to remember and apply the principle of least effort when attempting to lose your pursuer. As long as they see you, they’ll attempt to follow you wherever you may go. However, the harder you make it for them, the less aggressive they’ll become. For example, if you’re a female and you enter a female restroom, your pursuer, who are often males, might be more reticent to come after you. Despite all the efforts by the transgender community, a man entering the ladies’ room is still not normal and will be viewed as suspicious by bystanders.

Wherever you might be, always identify potential exit routes. It’s not just kidnapping you need to worry about: what if there’s a fire? Getting into the habit of identifying exits, not backing yourself into a corner, these are all universal ways of ensuring you have a way out of a bad situation, regardless of scenario or setting.

Should you ever confront your pursuer? Probably not. A professional kidnapper will likely maintain a certain distance from you, anyway, deny any ill intent, and disengage if they feel it’s too dangerous to make a grab. However, if they do have you backed into a corner with no way out, your only choice might be to forcefully confront them. I don’t mean to throw the first punch, but let them and everyone else around you know you’re on to your pursuer. This might provoke them to go ahead and make the grab, but it’ll also catch everyone else’s attention and, hopefully, someone will intervene. I know relying on the kindness of strangers is a fool’s errand, but you don’t really have another option. If you go quietly with your would-be kidnapper, nobody’s going to know you’re in trouble.

Finally, if you have kids, elderly, or unwell family members, or whomever, try not to leave them alone when out and about in public. If you’re responsible for their safety, take responsibility for their safety. I realize that it’s not always practical nor sensible to take your kids, elderly, or sick family members with you everywhere; use your best judgment. Have conversations with your family members, especially your kids, about what to do if confronted by strangers. If you have to leave them inside a car, don’t do it on a hot day, first off, and make sure they understand to keep the doors locked at all times.

If your family members carry electronic devices like smartphones, make sure you have location services enabled so you can track them. Dead-serious kidnappers will be cognizant of the fact such technologies exist and are in use, so don’t think of these as a definite means of making sure you can find your loved ones. However, it’s better than nothing and can help you in at least establishing a place to start looking if the unthinkable happens.

Just Watch Yourself And Others

When studying kidnapping, it’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking it could very easily happen to you and yours. Like all things related to prepping, remember that we ready ourselves not because it will happen, but because it might, so we just want to address concerns, have plans in place, and get on with the task of enjoying our lives. If after all the prepping, you’re still worried, you’re doing it wrong. We prep to worry less, not more, about risk.

Again, most of us will live our entire lives without anyone trying to kidnap us. Don’t take that for granted; take that as a reason to prepare with confidence. All you’re doing is taking someone which is already unlikely to happen to you and you’re just making the risk of it even lower. Where’s the harm in doing so?

Let’s talk about it. Have you taken a SERE course, either as a civilian or in the military? Do you know anyone who was the victim of either a kidnapping or an attempted kidnapping? What was their ordeal like? How did they get out?

Talk about it in the comments section. For all you new subscribers, welcome, first off! Second, though it’s been long since I last did so, prepping is actually what I enjoy writing about the most. It expends less of my mental faculties, even as critical thinking is absolutely required. I also feel like I’m doing more than just wailing about the world and warning you all of terrible things to come. I hope you enjoyed this departure from the usual subject matter. If you didn’t find it too intriguing (my prepping pieces are, unfortunately, also my least-read), we’ll be returning to the hot topics soon enough.

With that, it’s time for your loyal secret agent to leave home once more in service of all he knows and loves! I hope you all enjoy our time apart. Let’s hope the world doesn’t change too much in the meantime, a wish which has already been denied this past week.

Talk to you all again soon.

Max Remington writes about armed conflict and prepping. Follow him on Twitter at @AgentMax90.

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